After 15 years of friendship I had to say goodbye. There is a
belief that people come into our lives to serve a particular purpose and after
that purpose has been served, there is no longer a need for those people.
The period came when I realised it is about time that I moved
on from the heavy drinking, second hand smoking and sleeping out for days
without having any worry about having to take a bath. “As long as we brush out
teeth chomi, and wipe the relevant parts of our bodies, we are good to go!” In
my whole existence I have never thought that a time will come when these words
will come out of my mouth! Well there you go! My vomit…
The other thing about this friendship is that, it was linked
to other friendships that I kept for about five years and they too were not so
healthy. If we were not drinking and driving, waiting for someone to finish
getting laid in the toilet in a club, we were bailing someone at a police
station. It was the greatest and most fun time of my life. Shit! Those times
were fucken fun hay!
Another thing, when I was friends with these guys, I cursed
like crazy! And it sure damn fucken felt great after it! It all started as a
joke, and gradually developed to a habit, and from a habit to an uncontrollable
beast. I would wake up in the morning and call them just to take a hit. It was
as if I was addicted to this cursing drug. It was as if I needed to curse more
than I needed to take the last breath of oxygen to survive! “Hello bitch, you
bloody slut!” “You fucked-up piece of hopeless trash” I loved saying it, it
felt satisfying to my soul. Something was wrong, and the only way to end all
this madness was out.
Ye Ye Ye! I did try
all that, after returning from my year trip from Cape Town I kind of tried to
face the beast (cursing addiction) but I was viewed as the educated bitch who
is trying to change who they really are. I wish them the best with their lives,
and hope they get to be where I am standing, in order for them to see from this
view, that this friendship is fucked up! and beyond repair.
So here am I, trashing 15 years of friendship, others 5 and
others 3. The situation is beyond my control and personally, I believe that we
no longer want the same things in life. I need to grow intellectually,
spiritually, emotionally and most importantly educationally. oh damn, I needed
new friends, and most importantly I needed a new book to read!
The moral of the story is that while some people grow, some
don’t. No matter how long you may have known a person there will come a time
where you don’t have the same views to life. And if you decide to stay in this
friendship, you constantly keep clashing, repeating the same mistakes over and
over again. It became so clear that I had to move on. Look around you are you
friendships perfect or they are Justas fucked up as mine?
No comments:
Post a Comment